Shipping Complaints
by Amisa the Writer
Summary: Have you ever watched Attack on Titan? And, because you loved this anime, you look it up online, just to be mentally scarred with those awful shippings. Have you ever thought about how the actual AoT characters feel about shippings? I don't own Attack on Titan and this is also published by me on Wattpad. Hajime Isayama made up Attack on TItan and it is published by Kodansha.
1. So Not Approved

"Heichou!" Eren called, blushing as he stared at the computer screen, feeling quite nauseous from what he had just seen.

Levi opened the door that was behind Eren. "What, you brat?" he asked, annoyed from being interrupted from his oh-so-precious cleaning.

"Heichou!" Eren said bewilderedly, "Look at what those yaoi fangirls have done to us!" Levi peeked at the screen and then proceeded to throw up on the ground.

"Disgusting! No amount of cleaning chemicals can ever make my eyes clean again! Why did you do that Eren!" Levi exclaimed, punching Eren on the shoulder.

"It wasn't me, Levi-heichou," Eren said, a grim look on his face, turning around to face his leader, "Hange-san was using the computer before me, she said she wanted to show me something."

Levi burst out of the room running, and didn't stop until he had found Hange.

"Hey, shor-" Hange was cut off by Levi's right knee in her face, thus breaking her glasses. After the initial shock went away and Hange was lying on the floor, she said, "Hey, short stuff, what was that for?!" and tried to pick up what remained of her glasses.

"That was for traumatizing me and Eren," Levi said, contemplating whether or not to sock Hange in the face.

The brunette smirked. "So you do care about Ere-," this time, it was a punch in the gut administered again by Corporal Levi.

"Just because I'm human and don't want other humans, regardless of gender, to get traumatized or die doesn't mean I have romantic feelings for them," Levi said, a menacing look in his eyes, " if that was true, everyone who had a heart would subsequently enter a harem or a reverse harem."

"Huh? Levi, you're no fun," Hange groaned, lying on the floor again.

Levi picked Hange up and helped her sit down. Quickly, he planted a chaste kiss on her lips.

"I don't care for Eren in the way you're thinking, but I care about you Hange," he said, lightly blushing.

Hange smirked and said, "Ha, shorty, I have to sit down to be shorter than you," and then kissed him back.

Meanwhile, Eren looked through the internet, seeking to find out what the sick minds of Attack on Titan fans were making up now.

* * *

I do not own the Attack on Titan characters. This fanfic was made for humor purposes, so please don't take it way too seriously.


	2. Not Approved

This time, a little bit of throw up found itself in Eren's mouth as he put his head in hands and started crying.

Armin heard the crying noise from outside the room, so his kind nature kicked in, causing him to open the door.

"Ere-" Armin was cut off by his own shock at a crying Eren and a scarring - extremely scarring- image of him and Eren. Soon after looking upon the computer screen, Armin started crying. "Eren, why? Why would you look up such things? Why Eren, tell me, why?!" Armin said through the tears as he looked at the ground and shut his eyes, letting the tears roll down his cheeks.

"I don't know Armin, I don't know! Those fangirls, why?! I didn't even mean to look it up, Armin!" Eren screamed, tears streaming from his eyes as he looked right at Armin, noticing the blond boy's tears. "This is what the fangirls did, Armin! It isn't your fault or my fault," Eren said, walking over to Armin and place his hands firmly over Armin's shoulders. "You do trust me, right Armin?"

"Eren..." Armin said, looking at his best friend, "I need to change my look. You know, so none of the anime fans mistake me for a girl anymore."

Eren smiled, tears still in his eyes. "Sure, Armin, we can fix you up!" Armin smiled back at him.

After Eren found a pair of scissors, he let Armin sit in a chair. "Armin, are you sure?" Eren said as he held the scissors to Armin's hair. Armin smiled back at him and nodded, and Eren then cut away, blond locks falling to the ground.

A few minutes later, they were all done. Eren handed Armin a mirror. "Wow, Eren, you did a great job!" Armin exclaimed; his hair looked just like Eren's hair, except blond.

"Ha, Armin, you shouldn't underestimate the many skills and talents of Eren Jaeger!" Eren said with a smile.

Jean suddenly burst into the room. "I need to use to computer, so if you don't mind, Jae-" Jean seemingly froze as he stared at the computer screen.

"Jean, don't look at that!" Eren and Armin screamed simultaneously, tears starting to well up in the two boys' eyes, but it was too late. Jean had already saw what was on the screen.

"You guys... are disgusting... you know that?" Jean asked, with an empty, yet somewhat disgusted look on his face. "Putting stuff like that online, what's wrong with you guys?"

"Jean," Armin cried, "It wasn't us, it was the fangirls... the yaoi fangirls..."

"Oh no..." Jean said, fear in his eyes, "They're at it already?! But the anime started just last year! Their kingdom can't be that strong, not strong enough to post pictures like that, right, Armin!?"

Armin nodded grimly. "But you can't forget about those who have read the manga, which has been out since 2009,"

Jean's eyes widened in shock, "That means..."

"They've had nearly five years to form their yaoi basis in Attack on Titan," the three simultaneously said, panic rising up inside of them.

"That's why I cut Armin's hair! To make him look like less of a girl!" Eren exclaimed as he gestured to Armin. Armin had a look of hurt and irritation on his face. "No offense, though, Armin," Eren explained.

Jean stood for a while and then smirked. "Jaeger, you sound like a little kid," he said.

Eren was about to retort back, but Armin had started talking to Jean, "Eren was one of my only friends for a long time, so of course we're close."

Jean looked at the computer. "I need to change what's on the monitor just in case someone else comes in and sees," he said. But little did he know the power of the fandom was all over the internet. Jean made the fatal mistake of looking on to whatever Attack on Titan website he was on, because within five seconds, he fell backwards in his chai and started to choke on his own throw up. As Armin helped Jean not die, Eren screamed.

"WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING?!" he screamed as he ripped out some of his hair.


	3. Request- Not Approved

As Eren banged his head against the wall, sickened and frustrated, Jean cried on Armin's shoulder.

"Jean, what did you see?" Armin asked, wearing a worried look on his face, helping Jean sit up.

Jean just shook his head, tears rolling down his cheeks, and pointed to the screen, unable to speak. _I really don't want to look at the screen. Not now, maybe not ever again, _Armin thought. "Hey, Jean, maybe you can, um, just tell me what's on the screen, so, um, you know, I don't, um,end up going, uh," Armin said as he looked over to Eren, who was now sitting, staring at the wall blankly, his forehead a dark shade of blue, "so I don't end up like Eren."

"Armin," Eren said, looking at the wall, his eyes hopeless, "Jean and I, we aren't capable... of looking at the screen anymore. So only you are able to get us out of this sick fandom, before someone else comes in and gets traumatized." Armin gulped. Was he really mentally capable to go back to that computer? Armin looked at Jean, who was now crying on his shoulder, and then to Eren,who looked like his will to go on has been severely then got up, pushing Jean off his shoulder, causing him to slam to the ground, and turned around swiftly. One glance at the screen caused him to scream bloody murder.

"NOT MARCO!"Armin said as he got into a fetal position, head in his hands.

"Yeah, Jean, now you know how Armin and I feel. Marco was your best friend, wasn't he? You hate that shipping, you and Marco" Eren said. Jean responded with a sad cry and a nod.

Armin looked at Jean and said, "At least we know Marco's in better place now, in a place where there aren't any weird shippings, where he doesn't have to have his innocent mind corrupt." Jean just cried on the floor.

"Hey, and at least they didn't show his whole face in that picture," Eren said, "only half..." All three then proceeded cried out loud.

"WHAT KIND OF MESSED UP JOKE IS THIS?!" they all said. Somebody opened the door.


	4. We're only family

The door opened to show the person who was on the other side.

"Eren, Armin, are you guys okay?" Mikasa asked as she stepped over Jean and walked over to Armin, "I heard screaming."

Armin looked at Mikasa, a broken look on his face. Suddenly, he put his arms around Mikasa's neck and cried into Mikasa's shoulder. Surprised, Mikasa looked over to Eren, and one glance at that hopeless, tear streaked face made her go into Mama Bear mode. She headed towards Eren and grabbed him by the wrist. Usually, he would try to pry his hand out of her grip, but this time he just broke down and cried on Mikasa's free shoulder. They were clinging onto her like little children, so Mikasa marched over to Jean, her usually calm face replaced with an enraged mother's face, and grabbed him by the shirt, shook him, and screamed , "What did you do to my babies?!"

Jean, fearing for his life, panicked, not being able to think straight because his mind was severely scarred by the images he had just seen. "Mi-mi-mikasa," was all he could say.

"Listen, horseface, you've got five seconds to tell me what happened before I smash your face in for making my babies cry, you hear?!" Mikasa said, liftiing Jean up so he could stand.

"One," she started. Jean gulped.

"Oi, Mikasa, you've got it all wrong-" Jean started.

"Two," Mikasa said, her grip on Jean's shirt getting tighter.

"It all happened when I walked in and-" Jean needed to talk faster, but his words kept getting slurred because he was getting lost in Mikasa's beauiful dark eyes. _She's beautiful even if she's gonna kill me,_ Jean thought.

"Three," Mikasa said. Jean was at a loss of words_. No way of making it out of this one_,he thought.

"Four,"Mikasa said. Jean clenched his eyes together, hoping that the pain Mikasa would inflict on him would be administered quickly.

"Fi-"Mikasa was interrupted by Armin.

"Mikasa," Armin said, voice muffled by her clothes, "it wasn't Jean's fault. It was the... the..." Armin said as he cried into her shoulder. Mikasa's grip on Jean loosened, but she still didn't let go.

"Shh, Armin, it's going to be alright. Tell me what's wrong,"she said in a kind and loving voice that soothed Armin.

"It was the fangirls," he said, and Mikasa's eyes widened.

"What?!" she gasped as she quickly looked at the screen. But there wasn't any yaoi this time.

"Um, guys, that isn't yaoi," Mikasa said, her grip on Jean completely loosening, causing him to hit the ground with a thud. Mikasa's cheeks were getting redder and redder by the second.

"Eren, did you do that?" she asked as she tapped one of Eren's shoulders, causing him to look at the screen.

Eren was silent for a second. Then the blood-curdling screen let out. Eren was back to normal now, "I would never kiss Mikasa! Never, ever, ever, ever! At least, not in a romantic way like that!"

Mikasa just stared at the screen and blushed, "We're family, you sickos."

"Well, Mikasa, you and Eren aren't technically family, so I guess that's okay," Armin said._ At least it wasn't yaoi, _he thought.

"No,Armin,a ship between me and Eren isn't okay," Mikasa said, slightly swaying, "We're family... we're family... we're family." Mikasa then repeated that nonstop. Armin looked over to Jean, who had completely broken dowm.

"Why Jaeger, huh? Why does Jaeger get to be the one with her," Jean asked as he cried, helplessly.

Eren, who was back to his normal self, blushed madly as he sat on the chair in front of the computer screen and tried to find a way out of that picture of him and Mikasa kissing. Armin was already off of Mikasa's shoulder, so she had decided to sit and repeat, "We're family," while staring off into space.

Eren, Armin, and Jean looked pretty grim. "Eren, if the shippings could leave even Mikasa like this," Armin started with a gulp.

"Then there's no telling what they could do to us," Eren said,as he moved the computer mouse randomly.

"We're dead, and there's no way out of this," Jean said hopelessly.

"Well, maybe we can just walk out the room and nobody would notice," Armin said.

"Armin, you of all peopleshould know that plan isn't going to work," Eren said, his cheeks still as red as a tomato, "first of all, other's may have heard us screaming and crying in here. Second of all, if they press the back button, they could see all the embarassing shippings that included us. The only way we can get out of this room is when we figure out how to get out of this website and delete all the history!"

Eren then smiled at the other twoboys, "And we're all in this together, right guys?!" Armin and Jean nodded in agreement.

Suddenly, Eren's smile dissapeared. "I found my way off of that picture, just to find myself with this ship," Eren said, getting up from the chairm obviously irritated, "Jaeger is out! PEACE!" Eren slammed the door behind him. Jean and Armin were shocked and ran to the door, just to find it locked.

"What? This door locks from the outside? Who even made this up?!" Jean said as he jiggled the door knob.

"Hey, eventually Eren will come back, right?" Armin said, trying to reassure Jean, but he wasn't so sure, either.


	5. Partially Approved

The door opened, hitting Jean, but he didn't care. All he wanted to do was get Jaeger and drag him back into the awkward nightmare they were in.

"What did you think you were doing Jaeger!" Jean said as he lunged towards the person at the door, just to be confronted by a fist to his face, knocking him to the ground.

"Ow, what was that for?" Jean said as he rubbed his face. When he looked up at the attacker, he didn't see the Titan-boy. Instead, he saw a blond girl with a bored expression on her face.

"Annie..." Armin said, a look of dread on his face as he backed away from her slowly, but in doing so, his elbow accidentally hit the mouse of the computer. That one fatal mistake caused the screen to go deeper into something in the fandom that should have never existed in the first place: AruAnnie. To be more specific, an extremely romantic kiss between him and her was plastered on the screen.

Annie didn't see what was on the computer screen yet (lucky for her) and pushed passed Jean, saying, "I need to use the computer."

Jean, who was still irritated from getting punched, followed behind her. "Hey, aren't you going to apologize for trying to kill me?!" he exclaimed.

"Don't be so dramatic," she said, a bored look still on her face, "aren't you going to apologize for trying to attack me? By the way, what happened to Mikasa?" Mikasa was still sitting on the floor, but this time her knees were brought to her chest, still muttering about how she and Eren were only family.

Blushing madly, Armin tried to block the screen as best as he could with his skinny frame. Annie walked up to him.

"Armin, can you move?" she asked, her voice slightly sweeter than it was with Jean, her face still nonchalant. Armin shook his head.

"No, you- I mean I, I mean, no," Armin stuttered out, averting his sky blue eyes from Annie's.

"Armin, I need the computer," she said, starting to put a hand on his side, but he quickly pushed her rather hardly.

"No, Annie," Armin said, tears welling up in his eyes again, "you, you can't see what's behind me. It would ruin me." Jean just stared at the scene unfold in front of him.

Annie's face softened and she almost smiled, but not quite. "Armin," she said, placing a hand on his shoulder, " I guess you leave me no choice." Quickly she kicked his leg, causing the blond boy to lose his balance.

"NO!" he screamed but it was too late. Annie saw that AruAnnie ship on the screen.

She glanced at Armin, who was sitting on the ground with an adorable embarassed look on his face. Suddenly, she broke into laughter, clutching her stomach. "Wow, Armin, I didn't know you were into stuff like that," she laughed, making Armin blush even more.

"No, Annie, it wasn't me! I promise!" Armin said. I wish I were dead, he thought as he averted his eyes away from Annie.

Before he knew it, Annie was crouching next to him, whispering, "Hey, Armin, am I a good person to you?"

Armin nodded. "Of course you are Annie," he said, awkwardly laughing. Annie planted a kiss on his cheek and then got up.

"That's all I need to see for today," she said and swiftly walked out of the room, locking the door behind her.

Armin's face was burning up. Did Annie really just do that?

Meanwhile, Jean just stood by Armin in awe, terrified, but still wearing a smirk, opening his mouth up to say something to Armin. Armin let out a frustrated moan and pulled at put his hands on top of his head.

"Ugh, I hate this world! Why AruAnnie? Why fandom? Why shippings? Why can't we live together peacefully and not have to worry about what the fans are doing?" he asked and stomped over to where Mikasa was and sat next to her, blushing and staring at the ground.

Jean stared at the computer screen, trying to figure out how to get passed all of the fandoms and into freedom.

But what he did not notice was that the door behind was starting to open, revealing the next person to get traumatized.

* * *

Sorry for not updating sooner :) So, should the next chapter be like a break from all the shippings to follow what Eren is doing outside the room or no?

P.S Use clean language in the reviews!

P.S.S I love you all who read this and I love your reviews and I read all of them! Requests gladly appreciated and I am almost always certain to PM you if you review!


	6. Ha, as if

"I'm sick of it!" Eren exclaimed as he started pacing around the horse stables, extremely agitated by the fandom. "Really sick of my life right now, too. First, I see my own mom die, then I go through years of grueling torture to be in the military, and now people ship me with everyone! I'm done!" he said, kicking a tree.

"Oi, brat, who are you talking to?" a voice said a few feet away from him. It was Levi.

"Sorry, heichou, I was just angry because," Eren said, kicking the tree again, "because of the fandom and the shippings. It's like they totally underestimate me and think my goal in life is to be with whoever they ship me with."

Levi walked up to the younger soldier and patted his back (OOC Levi coming through!). "Hey, we've all been there, Eren. So, did you find a way out of that fan website you were on?"

Eren's eyes widened slightly as he looked at Levi. "Well, sir, actually..." Eren stopped and gulped, not really wanting to tell Levi he left the room without figuring out how to get off the website.

Levi scowled at Eren. "Jaeger, get back in that room right now," he ordered, dragging Eren all the way form the horse stables and up to the room of broken souls...

* * *

Previously on Shipping Complaints:

Jean stared at the computer screen, trying to figure out how to get passed all of the fandoms and into freedom.

But what he did not notice was that the door behind was starting to open, revealing the next person to get traumatized.

* * *

Time Skip TO NOW:

The door slowly opened, revealing Humanity's Last Hope and Humanity's Strongest Soldier: Eren Jaeger and Levi.

Within a minute of walking into the room, Eren had a fist in his face. The boy's first response was to go punch back at who he thought was Jean, but then he noticed Jean staring at him, shocked, from his spot in front of the computer screen. And Mikasa was finally out of her phase, but confused. Levi was standing right next to him. So all that leaves is...

"Armin?" Eren asked, taken by surprise by his friend's sudden attack. But this Armin wasn't the same Armin he was earlier that day. No, this Armin was a more experienced, a more traumatized Armin. And this Armin was shaped by the fandom. The fandom totally changed him.

"Listen up, Eren, why did you leave me, Jean, and Mikasa in here stuck in the fandom?" Armin said, standing over Eren, a menacing look in his eyes."Do you know what I've been through, personally, sitting in this room with little Miss 'We're Only Family' and horseface? And if that ain't bad enough, add the shippings into it. Uh-huh, you decided to leave me in this place of torture. And because of that, I have no hope," Armin said in a dark, brooding way.

Jean, whose feelings were hurt by the horseface comment, just stared at the now Emo Prince Armin.

Eren stared at Armin, regretting ever leaving Armin in a place of torture like the fandom. The regret consumed him to the point of tears, so he stood up and reached for Armin's hand and said, "Armin, I'm sorry. I was a bad friend. But let's make up, okay?"

Armin nodded. "I forgive you, but DON'T EVER TOUCH MY HAND AGAIN YOU FILTHY COMMONER. NOW UNHAND ME, THE EMO PRINCE!" Eren quickly let go of Armin's hand and backed away slowly.

Levi sighed, annoyed. Somehow, he found himself dragged into the shipping mess, so to preserve his reputation, he ventured towards the computer.

"Move, Kirstein," he ordered, and Jean moved out of the immidiately. Levi sat in front of the computer screen, trying to figure out how to get out of that website. But, little did our beloved Levi-heichou know that what he thought was the back button was really something that would move us on to our next darn shipping: Levi x Mikasa.

Levi's immediate reaction was to break the computer and everything in proximity to him, but quickly decided against it when he thought of the trouble of explaining the whole shipping thing to Erwin. So, as he stared at his shipping with Mikasa, he couldn't help but beckon her to look at the computer screen.

"Did you do this?" he asked, his tone dangerous. Mikasa looked at the screen, causing her to stand up abruptly and walk over to Levi.

"Is that some kind of joke? Why would I ever be with some creep like you? I still haven't gotten over what you did to my Eren," Mikasa said, her face also sending a dangerous glare to Levi.

"Hm, then who put this online? Do you have an answer for that, Eren's waifu?" Levi taunted, causing Mikasa to still glare but blush at Levi.

"I'm not his wife. Me and Eren are- are fami-" Mikasa started, the glare fading off of her face, but before she could finish her sentence, Armin interrupted her.

"No, Mikasa. We are not going to that 'We're only family' stuff again. Focus on the shipping the sick minds have made up for you," Armin said, gesturing to the computer screen. These words stopped Mikasa from getting any further into her phase.

"Anyways, why would I like anyone as short as him? I prefer people who a bit more- how should I say, fitting of the lofty title 'Humanity's Strongest Soldier," Mikasa taunted. Her words were starting to get to Levi.

"Did you just call me short, Ackerman? I hope you realize that I am senior and I am higher up in command," he said, glaring right at her, just to be confronted with a smirk from the all too sly Mikasa Ackerman.

"Higher up? Funny, last time I checked, I can reach higher up than you," Mikasa joked, cracking herself up. Levi gave her an extremely frightening look that was followed by an equally dangerous smirk.

"I thought you could come up with better comebacks, Ackerman," he retorted, thinking he had won that battle, but Mikasa persisted.

"Don't you dare think I'm done yet, little heichou," Mikasa said, causing Levi to get up, standing just inches away from her.

"Are you challenging me, Little Miss Eren's Wife?" Levi said, putting his hand on his cleaning spray.

Mikasa just put her hand on her hips and put her face in Levi's, saying, "Come at me, bro."

Just before Levi was going to spray Mikasa with whatever cleaning chemical that was in the bottle he had, Eren blurted out, "Stop flirting you two!"

Both heads snapped to Eren.

"Eren, you should know I'm not ever going to do that with him," Mikasa said with disgust.

"You must have a death wish in saying that, Jaeger. I'm not out to steal your woman," Levi retorted, causing Mikasa and Eren to blush.

"I'm not his woman. Nor is he my man," Mikasa said, averting her eyes away from Levi.

Eren nodded in agreement. "We're family!" he said, staring at the floor.

"Tch, that shipping is disgusting," Armin said, arms crossed against his chest, assuming the cool guy pose. All eyes darted towards him. "Mikasa is only fifteen, while Levi is definitely not a fifteen or sixteen year old guy. Anyways, this ship makes Levi-heichou look like a total pedophile," he said, nonchalantly, not really caring anymore.

"Thank you, Armin," Mikasa said. Levi nodded in agreement.

"No problem," Armin said, a cool look still on his face. "But we still have to get out of this fandom and it's shippings."


	7. Part 1 of the madness

"So, none of you guys know how to correctly use the computer?" Levi asked, extremely agitated. All three of the cadets shook their head, and Levi sighed.

"Hange-san was teaching me how to use it, and then," Eren explained, blushing, "she got me into the fandom."

"Tch, that woman," Levi said, wishing that Hange would just appear to fix the problem.

The door started to open up, causing everybody in the room to freeze. Hastily, before the door was opened, Eren grabbed his "not-so-wife," horse face, and the Emo Prince and hid in the nearest hiding place he could find: a closet. Levi tried to cover the screen so nobody would see his and Mikasa's shipping on the screen. In a futile attempt of closing the window before the door fully opened, he clicked on the wrong button that leads to our next shipping: Erwin x Levi.

Just as Levi was about the wreck the computer, he heard his superior's voice behind him.

"Levi, what are you doing?" Erwin asked in a strict, stern voice. Levi, still awkwardly trying to cover the computer screen even with his slim body, turned his head to look at his superior officer.

"Trying to help those kids with something," Levi said as he shuddered at the thought of Erwin ever finding out what was on the screen.

Erwin looked confused and glanced around the room quickly. "What kids are you talking about?" he asked, taken aback by Levi's strange behavior.

Levi's eyes slightly widened (which went unnoticed by Erwin) as was internally screaming as he realized that he couldn't find them. That is, until he heard a whisper(which also went unnoticed by Erwin).

"Psst, heichou," a voice coming from the closet said. Levi's eyes quickly snapped over to it, catching four pairs of eyes nervously looking at him.

"Sorry heichou, we didn't want to get caught," Armin whispered apologetically as he sweat dropped. Jean sighed, having hope that the Emo Prince Armin would fade away, but lost it quickly when he saw Armin attempt to cover one eye with his hair.

Mikasa smirked slightly in the darkness of the closet. _The little man is getting what he deserves out there,_ she thought.

"How dare you?!" Levi hissed angrily. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder and was confronted by the worried face of his commander.

"Levi, I think you need a break," Erwin said, a worried smile on his face, trying to push the short lance corporal away from the computer screen, but he wouldn't budge.

"Erwin, I'm fine," the shorter man insisted, panicking internally.

"Ha, this is what he gets for everything he's done to me," Mikasa whispered, just loud enough for Levi's especially sensitive ears to pick up.

"What did you say, Ackerman?!" Levi said, angrily turning away from the computer, revealing it to Erwin. The blond man's face turned into a look of absolute shock and horror.

Levi realized that he left the screen uncovered and quickly tried to block the screen, but it was too late. A sudden thud resounded through the room...

* * *

**MWAHAHAHA CLIFFHANGERS EVERYWHERE! So, there's part 1 of that chapter for you! (I should have warned you). Anyways sorry for the late update, love you, and tell me what you think.**

**I personally don't like yaoi or yuri at all XD. I think I'm going to do a bunch of straight chapters for a while...**


	8. Weekend at Levi's

**HA GUESS WHO'S BACK AFTER TWO YEARS!**

**'Tis your dear lady Amisa. Yes, I've gone rogue for a while, but I assure you I am back. All these reviews are what inspired me to go back to writing this trash instead of working on my best pieces of my eloquent work or doing any of my AP summer English homework.**

**Oh well... Let's get this show on the road!**

Previously on Shipping Complaints, our five protagonists, Jean, Eren, Mikasa, and Armin (ahem, excuse my mistake, the EMO prince who has been traumatized the most by the horrors they've seen in the room), and Levi are trying to close all the explicit r18 Attack on Titan shipping tabs on the computer before more characters are scarred by the ships.

The problem? None of them except Hanji knows how to use a computer.

What else? Erwin Smith, the commander, has seen one of the ships and collapsed on the floor. Is he dead?

The plot thickens in this episode of Shipping Complaints.

"Did we just..."

"Did he..."

"OH MY GOD WE KILLED THE COMMANDER" Eren shrieked at the sight of their fallen leader before he was knocked over by a sudden punch to the face.

He looked up, expecting it to be that asshat, Jean, but suprisingly, it was Armin. Wait-no, the Emo Prince. Why the hell did he even call himself that? And why the hell did Eren fall for the same thing twice?

"Ow what the hell Armin why did you hit me?" Eren asked as he rubbed his now red cheek. He wished that his best friend would go back to the sweet lovable character that fangirl ls loved to pounce on and ship him with all kinds of people, but it didn't seem like it would happen anytime soon.

"It's Emo Prince to you," Armin said cooly. He and Eren locked eyes for a second before Armin punched him again.

"OW WHAT WAS THAT ONE FOR?!" Eren cried out as put a palm to his eye to alleviate the pain.

"Scum like you don't get to make eye contact with me unless given permission to," Armin replied, running a hand through his luciously blond locks that contrasted his dark, brooding personality (the new and improved ones that fangirls would love to eat up!).

Eren's brows furrowed and he was about to try to get his best friend out of this weird "cool" phase but was interrupted by Mikasa and Levi carrying the commander's body-Mikasa held him under the arms, while Levi held his feet. Jean stood in the corner looking as terrified as ever.

"What are you going to do...with his body?" Jean asked, his voice quivering in anxiety.

"Ackerman and I have come up with a plan," Levi said seriously, "Jaeger, get my device from my pocket." Eren hesitated. He already had enough people who were after him-did he really need anymore by assisting in covering up Erwin's untimely demise?

"Well what are you waiting for, brat?" Levi was getting annoyed by the Titan shifter's reluctance to get his "device" for him.

"Yes, sir," Eren sighed as he went over to Levi. "Which pocket is the device in?"

"The back one."

Eren's face involuntarily turned red. My hand...it's so close to heichou's behind... So close, Eren thought as his hand moved painfully slow towards Levi's back pocket.

Just when he was about to touch that national treasure, Jean intercepted and grabbed the thing out of Levi's pocket. Eren stared at Jean, shocked by the betrayal. "Jaeger, you're going to excite...them," Jean whispered. The fangirls...they're always watching. Eren quickly backed off.

The thing that was in Levi's pocket- a pair of rocking shades that had # on one lens and swag on the other. Jean, Eren, and the Emo stared in confusion and disbelief.

"You got it?" Levi asked. Jean nodded and Levi continued. "Seems like you brats can actually do something right. Now, put them on Erwin." And so they did.

As soon as the swag shades were on, Mikasa and Levi intricately placed Erwin on a chair, high fiving afterwards. "It's a success," Mikasa said rather plainly.

Eren, Emo, and Jean stared on in extreme confusion.

"I call this Weekend at Levi's"

Two years is so long, sorry for that. But hey I'm here for the summer (maybe more if AP classes don't suck the life out of me-which they probably will). This was fun to write. Reviews greatly appreciated, they make my day.


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